I remember when being gay was anathema. Most folks whispered it as if being gay was a dirty secret. Even those who didn't believe there was anything wrong with being gay whispered those words. You didn't want to out a friend, who could lose a job, or worse.
I'm a straight woman and a fierce gay ally. I have been my entire life, long before the term "ally" was in use. For the backstory, head to the homepage, and you'll see why. I never cared about if or why someone was LGBTQIA; it just didn't matter to me. We also had a lot fewer letters at that time, but I still don't care.
I remember the days when AIDS was a death sentence. The fear and panic that came along with "Gay Cancer," or even worse "GRID" (Gay-Related Immune Deficiency), most foul terms. The same bigots who wanted a reason to hate tried to leverage AIDS to drive hatred. I'm proud of the work I did to battle those foul creatures.
Not until you've buried someone you love or multiple people you love from AIDS can a person truly understand the brutality of that lethal disease during that period. That's not to say it's okay now, but now you can live a wonderful long life with HIV. This isn't about that illness; it's just a reference to how low people would go to harm other humans.
I argued once upon a time around being born gay or choosing to be gay. I believe folks are born gay; it just makes logical sense to me. There is also much more scientific proof today. The person disagreeing with me tossed every cliche in the book until I finally snapped, "Born gay or not, I don't really give a shit. If being gay is a choice, that's cool with me. Tell me this, why would a boy pray every single night from a tender age that he gets "fixed" and stops liking other boys? We're talking pre-puberty before he even knows what it means that he's having crushes on boys and not girls. Explain that one; you bigoted..." I'm not proud of the word I called her, but you can probably guess which word I used. If you can't, add your own. Like everything else in my life, I'm an equal opportunity cusser.
She had no answer, and I'm sure I didn't change her mind, but for a brief moment, I know she had to think. I'm a fierce protector of all of the people I love because I love every single thing about the people I love.
We humans, we're all so much more alike than different, and it pains me that so many people ignore that fact. If you, your spouse, child, or anyone you loved needed an organ transplant, would you care who donated that organ? If the answer is yes, you have more problems than we can address in my little blog.
Again, hop back to the homepage if you want to see how I determine if someone is a person of value. Look, this is it in a nutshell:
Be nice.
Don't do any deliberate harm.
Don't kick puppies or kittens.
Don't spit off of a tower.
I'd probably give you a chance if you spit off of the tower, but the others are the important ones. BE NICE!
Pride in who we are is essential for all people. Accepting all people for who the person is, is essential for all people. Be proud, have PRIDE, and if you're an ally, stand fiercely and proudly.
Love will always win. For years people have tried to convince me that isn't true. Do you know what I've found? Love always wins when you choose to live your life with love and not judgment or hate.